Mark's not home.

I woke up this morning and went downstairs for breakfast. I immediately noticed the box of Honeycomb cereal left out on the counter. It made me a little irritated. We just don't leave cereal out around our house because of Mark. My first thought was: "Mark is going to get into this cereal and go nuts". (He's on a gluten and casein free diet). Then it hit me. hard. Mark's not home. It's these small daily reminders that Mark is not with us, but is instead here that really get to me. The first night, it was his open door to his bedroom late at night. Then it hit me. Mark's not home. Yesterday, it was the neighbor's dog barking - which always leads to an episode of head-banging for Mark. In the odd ensuing silence, I realized, Mark is not home.

After consulting with a couple of his doctors, we made the hard choice this past weekend to admit Mark to the Sea Harbor program at the Central Florida Behavioral Hospital. After yet another weekend of crisis-inducing behaviors (violent head-banging, biting himself, and being very aggressive towards us) we knew we had to move beyond all that we have tried up to this point. Spending the day there on Saturday touring and interviewing and being interviewed about Mark was emotionally exhausting. Leaving him there at the end of the day was one of the hardest things Cecilia and I have ever done. And while we hold out hope that this 30 (possibly even 60) days of treatment, therapy, and observation will lead to breakthrough for Mark, we can't be sure. Since his admission on Saturday, we visited him on Sunday afternoon, again on Tuesday evening, and we will be going there again this afternoon. After that, we can only visit one time per week. That's going to be tough. We hope to see some hopeful signs today.

Thanks to all who have prayed, written encouraging notes and emails, sent cards, called us, and offered to help in many ways. I feel badly that I have responded to precious few of those emails, voice mails, and notes so far, but I still intend to. Please know that we appreciate the acts and words of kindness and the support of friends. Because many of you have asked, i will post periodic updates here. If you want to know more, feel free to call or email (although I may be a bit slow in responding). And keep praying, please. for Mark. for us. for the whole family.


Hanging in there ...



Ohhhh ... one last thing. Today is World Autism Awareness Day. We're quite "aware" of autism and its impact on people. Today might be a good day for you to pick up some new info on this modern epidemic. Just google.